Things I Haven't Done Yet

Mamacita says:

1.  I haven’t taken the wreath off the front door.  I can’t.  It’s been pouring down rain for three solid days, and I can’t put the wreath away soaking wet, can I?  Besides, I like to see it still there, telling the world that within this house dwell people who know how to do Christmas up right.

2.  I haven’t taken the lighted wreath off the wall inside the house, either.  I like to have something still twinkling, and I haven’t unplugged that wreath since Thanksgiving.  I’ll take it down when it stops raining and I can take down all the wreaths together.

3.  I haven’t put any medication on this horrific long deep cat scratch on  my shoulder today.  I really should, I suppose, because it’s starting to glow.  I’m not mad at the cat; she was only trying to jump down from the printer, and she assumed that my shoulder was a stepping stone.  When I moved, she tried to hold on for dear life.   I get that a lot.

4.  I haven’t gone to bed before 3 a.m. since well before Thanksgiving.  I have to go to meetings all day tomorrow and well into the night, so maybe I’ll turn in early tonight.  Well, almost 2 a.m. is early compared to 3 a.m., isn’t it?

5.  I haven’t taken any naps, either.  I’m not a napper.  If I’m going to go to sleep, I want it to be worth my while.  I’m not turning down the bed or getting out a blanket for an hour or two.  I also really hate resent it when somebody is napping in any room where people are trying to be awake and doing something. Sleeping is for bedrooms. Couches only when you’re spending the night and all the guest beds are full and it’s night.  If you’re determined to nap where the action is, don’t get all hissy with me when there are pans rattling and people talking in normal tones of voice and a chick flick movie resounding in the kitchen.   I have spoken.

6.  I still haven’t watched Titanic yet, even though I’ve owned a copy of the movie for many years.  Can’t get interested enough to sit still that long.  Besides, my son used to have the action figure of Leonardo de Caprio as Jack at the bottom of his piranha aquarium, and it cracked me up too much to get serious about the plot.

7.  I haven’t been able to figure out why people are so crazy about A Christmas Story. I had the DVD and gave it away to my Other Sister for my nephew.  It was cute, sure.  Nostalgic, sure.  But I only keep the movies I know I’ll watch again and again, and with A Christmas Story, once was enough.

8.  I have never “matched” any of my family or friends when it comes to “favorite Julie Andrews movie.”  Theirs is always The Sound of Music or Mary Poppins.  Now, I LOVE The Sound of Music – even though they family-ed and cutesied-up the movie version and left out the genuinely scary and upsetting stuff  – and I could watch Mary Poppins over and over again, getting more and more disgusted by those parents every time, but my favorite Julie Andrews movie is Victor/Victoria.

9.  I have never learned to like coffee or tea, not a single kind of either.  Hot or iced, flavored or plain. . . I loathe them all.  I think this might mean that I am not a real adult.  I’ve had my suspicions for a while.

10.  I have never learned to like or even tolerate celery.  It’s just too much like congealed snot with strings.  Peanut butter doesn’t help.

Okay, I’m going to brush my teeth, smear some kind of medication on this huge scratch, and go to bed.  I’ve got lives to change tomorrow.


Comments

Things I Haven't Done Yet — 12 Comments

  1. I still haven’t watched Titanic yet…. Besides, my son used to have the action figure of Leonardo de Caprio as Jack at the bottom of his piranha aquarium, and it cracked me up too much to get serious about the plot.

    I like your son’s sense of humor.

  2. I still haven’t watched Titanic yet…. Besides, my son used to have the action figure of Leonardo de Caprio as Jack at the bottom of his piranha aquarium, and it cracked me up too much to get serious about the plot.

    I like your son’s sense of humor.

  3. The Shady Dame of Seville!

    1, 2, 3, 4, 6, 8– absolutely. Titanic is ridiculous, syrupy, improbable dreck, and watching Leonardo DiCaprio with Kate Winslet is like watching Madonna with Britney for me.

    If I didn’t nap in this family of snorers, I’d never get any sleep, and I already have great big shadows.

    But I find A Christmas Story hilarious. My dad cursed like his dad– but for real, and we had people like the Bumpuses with their idiot dogs live right down the street from us– and one of ’em partially ate my pet rooster (we had an incubator in science class). I also like the idea of Darren McGavin doing comedy– it’s weird.

    But to each her own, you also don’t like green bean casserole, but that’s because you haven’t had mine, poor dear.

    Happy New Year!

  4. The Shady Dame of Seville!

    1, 2, 3, 4, 6, 8– absolutely. Titanic is ridiculous, syrupy, improbable dreck, and watching Leonardo DiCaprio with Kate Winslet is like watching Madonna with Britney for me.

    If I didn’t nap in this family of snorers, I’d never get any sleep, and I already have great big shadows.

    But I find A Christmas Story hilarious. My dad cursed like his dad– but for real, and we had people like the Bumpuses with their idiot dogs live right down the street from us– and one of ’em partially ate my pet rooster (we had an incubator in science class). I also like the idea of Darren McGavin doing comedy– it’s weird.

    But to each her own, you also don’t like green bean casserole, but that’s because you haven’t had mine, poor dear.

    Happy New Year!

  5. I hate celery too! The strings are intolerable, and I really think it bitters up whatever it touches. A perfectly good salad or mouthful of soup turns icky when I bite into a piece of celery.

  6. I hate celery too! The strings are intolerable, and I really think it bitters up whatever it touches. A perfectly good salad or mouthful of soup turns icky when I bite into a piece of celery.

  7. Remove the strings and fill the celery with pimento cheese. That sound better?

    No coffee or tea either? I worry about you! I guess all that soda is what keeps you awake so long.

    I can nap in the den along with 4-5 other people and the TV going!

  8. Remove the strings and fill the celery with pimento cheese. That sound better?

    No coffee or tea either? I worry about you! I guess all that soda is what keeps you awake so long.

    I can nap in the den along with 4-5 other people and the TV going!

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