Things Nice People Already Know

Things Nice People Already Know

beniceorleaveMamacita says:

1.  When the elevator door opens, wait until the people inside exit before you enter.  Don’t stand directly in front of the elevator, either; stand to the side so people have room to exit.

2.  When you are driving and need to turn, use your turn signals.  Turn them on a half block before you turn, DON’T swing out into the other lane as you turn, and be sure you turn into the inside lane.

3.  Do not allow your children to open and play with toys in a store unless you intend to buy them.  Otherwise, you’re just a jerk, and one of the reasons things are so expensive.

4.  I know it’s expensive to dine out, but please leave your server a tip.  He/she works hard, and some restaurants’ managers are evil, Satanic entities who count on tips added to the hourly wage to make minimum wage; other bad, bad managers have a Tip Jar.  If your server is good, tip well.  Of course, if your server isn’t good, leave him/her a nickel.  Tips are for good service, not begrudging, slow, bad service.  But if you get good service, please acknowledge it with a nice tip.  It’s not easy to be a server.

5.  Turn your car stereo down.  Sub-woofers that vibrate like a jackhammer and can be heard in the next county over make you look like a redneck tool.

6.  Please watch your language when you’re in public.  There are children listening, even when you don’t realize it, and just because they aren’t YOUR children doesn’t mean we shouldn’t all behave ourselves.

7.  Turn off your cell phone in the theater, and don’t talk.  If you can’t do both of these things, please rent the movie and watch it at home.  Also? Have dinner before you come to the show.  Popcorn is one thing, but thirty dollars worth of lard, salt, and refined sugar, all with loud, crinkly wrappers,  ruin the experience for the people who have to sit near you.  People with small bladders should sit on the aisles.  If your child is too young to shut up in the theater, your child is too young to be taken to the show.  Go home.

8.  I think it’s wonderful to meet a friend while shopping, but please don’t stand in the aisle talking; you’re in the way.  If you want to have a conversation, go to the lobby or foyer or lounge or restroom, or someplace where you aren’t inconveniencing others.  If the restroom is small, don’t hang out in there, either.

9.  If you brush your teeth in a public restroom, please clean out the sink when you’re finished.  That’s just common courtesy.  If there is only one sink in a busy restroom, don’t do anything except wash your hands hurriedly.

10.  If you take your children to the public library, please teach them to whisper first.  People who talk out loud in the library are boorish.

Things Nice People Already Know

Got Snow?

Mamacita says:  As I sit at the dining room table with my new laptop Hal and look across the living room and out the big window there, I can see our huge shagbark hickory tree. Today, of course, it’s covered with snow. The raised flower bed around its trunk is buried in the snow. I love this big tree, and so do the squirrels. Most days, the squirrels are running up and down the trunk, and back and forth across the branches and limbs, almost constantly. The cats like to sit on the back of the big living room chair and watch.  I always know when there’s a squirrel because the cats stand up on the chair and bristle.  When there are birds, Millicent chirps loudly in their language, and Vera beats on the window glass as if it were a drum.

When we’re buried in snow, as we are this week, it always makes me think of the day I got married.  The church was buried in snow on that day, and few people were even able to come to the wedding because the snow was just too deep to navigate.  My new husband had to borrow his father’s pickup truck to get us to our little house, and once we got there, we were pretty much completely snowed-in for a month!  Every time the city and county managed to dig out a path wide enough for cars to travel on, it would snow again and fill it in.  It reminded me of Laura Ingalls Wilder’s The Long Winter, when she wrote about how the railroad would dig out the tracks only to have them filled with snow again before the trains could even go through.  When I was finally able to drive to my teaching job some twenty miles away, it was like driving through a tunnel; the snow was piled up so high on both sides of the road.

But even now, all these years later, I think of that time when I look out of the windows and see the snow piled deep.

My mind’s eye can also see my small children, building snowmen and making angels. . . .

We’re trapped in this house, but it’s a pleasant experience.

Of course, if I hadn’t stocked up on milk, bread, and toilet paper last Monday, my attitude might be quite different indeed.

My son is also here; he’s just as trapped as we are.  He’s worried about the pipes in his apartment freezing, but there’s nothing he or anyone else can do about it, so he isn’t dwelling on that, but rather on all the square meals he’s getting while visiting Mommy’s house.

The snow is so deep, they’ve even cancelled COLLEGE!  And that is something that just hardly ever happens.

This is the view from the French doors in the back of the house, off the deck.  So far, we haven’t even seen any deer venture out of the woods.

The snow is beautiful, smooth and pristine, but to tell y’all the truth, I like it much better when the snow is mussed up, after little kids have played in it.

Sigh.  All those sleds in the garage and under the deck, going to waste.

I’m doing a lot of reading.  Life is not really life without a good book to look forward to.

As I was telling Fausta earlier today, when I’m snowed in, I like to bake.  It helps heat the house, and it satisfies something in me; perhaps it’s dormant domesticity.  My husband and son are having homemade lasagna for supper, and I’m going to bake a lot of bread later tonight.  I might even get my 30-year-old sourdough starter out of the freezer, feed it up, and get it going.  I might as well, because we aren’t going anywhere for the next few days.  To which I say, “Cool!”

Things Nice People Already Know

Ten Things Tuesday

Mamacita says:

1.  Winter storm warning.  6 inches of snow expected.

2.  It’s snowing.

3.  14 degrees outside.

4.  Sugar-free popsicles are pretty good.

5.  When the ground is frozen solid, does the mortuary just store the bodies in the back room until there’s a thaw?  How does that work? Wouldn’t digging with a jackhammer vibrate the other caskets?  I think of such things because my aunt died.

6.  Broadway’s “Beauty and the Beast” has a really good soundtrack.

7.  I adored Freddie Mercury with unswerving devotion, but how in the world could he sing like that with those teeth?  I suppose he was used to it; I read that he didn’t get them fixed because he was afraid his voice would be different.  Voice?  He had the voice of a heartbroken angel.  I still get shivers listening to him.

8.  Michael Ball is still gorgeous.  Such dimples.

9.  Why are there no desperately romantic stories about a handsome man and a hideous girl?

10.  I’m cold.

I am Mamacita. Accept no substitutes!

Hitting the fan like no one else can...

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Scheiss Weekly by Jane Goodwin (Mamacita) is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 United States License.