Quotation Saturday: The Weekend
Mamacita says: This weekend is unlike any I’ve ever experienced, ever. I can’t remember it ever happening, anyway. If you are a pervert, burglar, murderer, or one of my stalkers, please cover your eyes as other people read the following: I’m alone in the house, ie, nobody’s home but me.
And since it’s temporary, it’s bloody awesome. It’s after 3 in the morning and I’ve got the music cranked up to eleven. I’m wearing flannel pants with skulls on them. (I was going to post a picture but maybe your imagination is better, here.) I’m eating pecans and caramel dip. With a spoon. Out of the container. Diabetes, hold thy tongue, because I’m going to make popcorn in a few minutes. With extra butter. I’ll blame any weight gain on my stupid former gym that moved the treadmills upstairs where I can’t access them. The dryer keeps beeping but I’m ignoring it, because it’s full of towels and I’m not folding them today. I’m surfing the net and commenting and writing articles and daydreaming about sleeping in. I’ve been reading and petting the cats and answering emails and doing pretty much everything except housework and grading essays. I haven’t worn shoes since Thursday night class. Really, the only normal thing I’ve done all day is shower, because even when I’m alone, you know, pew and stuff?
So what better topic for this weekend’s Quotation Saturday than The Weekend itself? Maybe, even, some odd quotes about The Weekend?
1. Living up to ideals is like doing everyday work with your Sunday clothes on. –Ed Howe
2. Every man has a right to a Saturday night bath. — Lyndon B. Johnson (If you know the history behind this quote, it’s even better.)
3. Only Robinson Crusoe had everything done by Friday. — Author Unknown
4. Weekends don’t count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless. — Bill Watterson
5. If I do not return to the pulpit this weekend, millions of people will go to hell. — Jimmy Swaggart (My apologies for including this one, but I can’t help laughing at anything he ever said.)
6. Every Friday I used to have about fifty, sixty kids who would wait for me on Sunset Boulevard and I’d take them all to dinner. All runaways. — Al Lewis
7. There is nothing, I think, more unfortunate than to have soft, chubby, fat-looking children who go to watch their school play basketball every Saturday and regard that as their week’s exercise. — John Fitzgerald Kennedy
8. I don’t know what your childhood was like, but we didn’t have much money. We’d go to a movie on a Saturday night, then on Wednesday night my parents would walk us over to the library. It was such a big deal, to go in and get my own book. — Robert Redford
9. The dog doesn’t know the difference between Saturday, Sunday, and Monday, so I have to walk the dog early those days too. — Donna Shalala
10. On a lazy Saturday morning when you’re lying in bed, drifting in and out of sleep, there is a space where fantasy and reality become one. Are you awake, or are you dreaming? You see people and things; some are familiar; some are strange. You talk, you feel, but you move without walking; you fly without wings. Your mind and your body exist, but on separate planes. Time stands still. For me, this is the feeling I have when ideas come. — Lynn Johnston
11. Poetry is truth in its Sunday clothes. — Joseph Roux
12. What is to be done with people who can’t read a Sunday paper without messing it all up?… Show me a Sunday paper which has been left in a condition fit only for kite flying, and I will show you an antisocial and dangerous character who has left it that way. — Robert Benchley
13. Do not let Sunday be taken from you. If your soul has no Sunday, it becomes an orphan. — Albert Schweitzer
14. Measure not men by Sundays, without regarding what they do all the week after. — Thomas Fuller
15. I don’t like to be gone all weekend and at night too. Because for 20 years, I’ve had children who are in school. — Meryl Streep
16. I much prefer working with kids whose life could be completely upended by a reading of a book over a weekend. You give them a book to read – they go home and come back a changed person. And that is so much more interesting and exciting. — Russell Banks
17. If all the cars in the United States were placed end to end, it would probably be Labor Day Weekend. — Doug Larson
18. “- “I’ve been thinking Hobbes –”
– “On a weekend?”
– “Well, it wasn’t on purpose…” — Bill Watterson.
19. The rhythm of the weekend, with its birth, its planned gaieties, and its announced end, followed the rhythm of life and was a substitute for it. — F. Scott Fitzgerald
20. Can’t anything be done about calling these guys student athletes? That’s like referring to Attila the Hun’s cavalry as “weekend warriors.” — Russell Baker
21. I used to get a haircut every Saturday so I would never miss any of the comic books. I had practically no hair when I was a kid! — R. L. Stine
22. Later, in the early teens, I used to ride my bike every Saturday morning to the nearest airport, ten miles away, push airplanes in and out of the hangars, and clean up the hangars. — Alan Shepard
23. Middle age is when you’re sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn’t for you. — Ogden Nash
24. The worst thing about Saturday Night Live now is that, in the last 10 to 15 years, they’ve grown to some 40 writers. We had seven. And seven actors. — Chevy Chase
Sometimes the Pearls ARE Swine.
Mamacita says: These particular scum-sucking spawn “humanoids” are once again being discussed in the Blogosphere, so I’m re-running my own take on them. I refer to Michael and Debi Pearl.
I beg of you all, do not buy any books by these people. (link removed on advice from much smarter person than me.) I have seen other blogposts and articles that expose these people for what they really are, but I think this is the first time I’ve posted my opinion here. (I call them “people” only because of my innate good breeding. I do not consider the authors of this book “people” at all. They are monsters.)
Michael and Debi Pearl. They are the Child Abuse Gurus of the uneducated and ignorant masses.
Follow their advice and you can murder your children in the name of blatant stupidity love. Beware of stupid people with masters and weapons. Kool-aid, anyone? Thrust your babies into the fire that YOU might enter paradise?
Show your deep and abiding love for your innocent little infant by hitting him with a stick and drawing blood. Be sure you lower the blinds first, because you know how those nosy neighbors like to call CPS on you. Choose your weapon carefully; you don’t want nosy daycare workers to see any welts. PVC plumbing pipes are good for hitting. Pull his hair out. Pinch him till it bleeds. Bite him. THAT’LL teach him to go to sleep when you tell him to; he’s four months old already and it’s time he’s aware of who’s in charge. It’s all about control, and showing your kids who’s the boss. And when your kids are too young to understand words, you can be sure they’ll understand pain. Train them like the dogs they are.
Dear Lord. Do not let these people get any more followers. They are evil, and they prey upon the ignorant. Their book is nothing more than a handbook for sadists and child abusers, with lines of scripture thrown in here and there to fool those who are easily fooled by such tactics. It’s the same tactic used by the KKK in their brochures. They are banking on you not being smart enough to understand what they are really saying.
I am not saying that we should let our children be the bosses. No way. I think by now you all know my opinion of brats. But I am saying that an adult who can be the boss only by inflicting pain on a child, or an INFANT, is a mighty poor excuse for a human being. And a supposed authority figure who not only encourages it, but TEACHES PEOPLE HOW, is evil personified.
Please, all you supposedly good and reputable websites who are allowing these people to advertise on your site: No more. Their presence on your website is bringing you down and reducing your credibility to the lower depths. Surely their money doesn’t mean THAT much to you? Although, if the ads remain, I guess it does, huh.
I know that there are people who claim they can take ‘some’ of these people’s advice and ignore the rest. No, you can’t. The mere presence of this book in your home is creepy. Heck, we can find good advice here and there in anything. Even a stopped clock is right twice a day.
Let’s love our children, and teach them by example. Let’s discipline them gently. Let’s not draw blood and raise welts and end each day with a handful of soft child’s hair in our hands, and a little toddler’s blood in our teeth.
Just thinking of these people makes me cry. And thinking of these people also makes me furious, at them, and at anyone who follows their violent and sadistic methods.
Let’s go home and hug our children. That’s “hug” them, not beat them. Unlike the Pearls, I do not believe in disciplining little children with whips, chains, and blood-letting.
I hope there is a Hell that will give this couple, and all who follow them, exactly what they deserve. EXACTLY. Let them spend eternity being treated as they treated their own children and advised the ignorant to treat theirs.
As for the ignorant who follow their example, I do not feel sorry for you, either. I hope you end up in the next cell beside the Pearls. It’s one thing to be ignorant and hurt only yourselves, but when you are ignorant and hurt little children on purpose, you deserve precisely the same treatment.
Bah. These people make me sick.
Quotation Saturday: Snow
Mamacita says: Since southern Indiana has been covered with snow for two weeks now, I thought I’d use that same idea for Quotation Saturday. The forecast for tomorrow night, indeed, is for more snow, but unless the “feel” of the air changes between now and then, I would put my money – if I had any – on torrential rain. The thing is, I love snow, as long as I don’t have to go somewhere in it. I also worry about my students, who are driving in from every direction, the good ones concerned about missing class. When they call or email me about unplowed roads and sheets of ice, I tell them to stay home, with full attendance points. Those who stay home without contacting me are no doubt doing the right thing, but without the attendance points.
1. Getting an inch of snow is like winning 10 cents in the lottery. — Bill Watterson
2. Snow and adolescence are the only problems that disappear if you ignore them long enough. — Earl Wilson
3. Cats are smarter than dogs. You can’t get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. — Jeff Valdez
4. Nature has no mercy at all. Nature says, “I’m going to snow. If you have on a bikini and no snowshoes, that’s tough. I am going to snow anyway. — Maya Angelou
5. The first fall of snow is not only an event, it is a magical event. You go to bed in one kind of a world and wake up in another quite different, and if this is not enchantment then where is it to be found? -–J.B. Priestley
6. In any man who dies there dies with him, his first snow and kiss and fight. Not people die but worlds die in them. — Yevgeny Yevtushenko
7. Advice is like snow; the softer it falls, the longer it dwells upon, and the deeper it sinks into, the mind. — Samuel Taylor Coleridge
8. The future lies before you, like paths of pure white snow. Be careful how you tread it, for every step will show. — Unknown
9. The Eskimos had fifty-two names for snow because it was important to them: there ought to be as many for love. — Margaret Atwood
10. The snow doesn’t give a soft white damn whom it touches. — e.e. cummings 
11. A snowflake is one of God’s most fragile creations, but look what they can do when they stick together! –Author Unknown
12. Resting on your laurels is as dangerous as resting when you are walking in the snow. You doze off and die in your sleep. — Ludwig Wittgenstein
13. Few things are as democratic as a snowstorm. — Bern Williams
14. The aging process has you firmly in its grasp if you never get the urge to throw a snowball. — Doug Larson
15. Each snowflake in an avalanche pleads not guilty. –Voltaire
16. They say that every snowflake is different. If that were true, how could the world go on? How could we ever get up off our knees? How could we ever recover from the wonder of it? — Jeanette Winterson
17. You are not a beautiful, unique snowflake… This is your life, and it’s ending one minute at a time.
-– Chuck Palahniuk
18. It’s a pity one can’t imagine what one can’t compare to anything. Genius is an African who dreams up snow. — Vladimir Nabokov
19. I seemed to vow to myself that some day I would go to the region of ice and snow and go on and on till I came to one of the poles of the earth, the end of the axis upon which this great round ball turns. — Ernest Shackleton
20. When I no longer thrill to the first snow of the season, I’ll know I’m growing old. — Lady Bird Johnson
21. Sunshine cannot bleach the snow, Nor time unmake what poets know. — Ralph Waldo Emerson
22. The snow falls, each flake in its appropriate place. — Zen saying
23. Silently, like thoughts that come and go, the snowflakes fall, each one a gem. — William Hamilton Gibson
24. A little snow, tumbled about, anon becomes a mountain. — William Shakespeare
25. I think we are bound to, and by, nature. We may want to deny this connection and try to believe we control the external world, but every time there’s a snowstorm or drought, we know our fate is tied to the world around us. — Alice Hoffman
26. “It’s snowing still,” said Eeyore gloomily. “So it is.” “And freezing.” “Is it?” “Yes,” said Eeyore. “However,” he said, brightening up a little, “we haven’t had an earthquake lately.” –A.A. Milne
27. When you live in Texas, every single time you see snow it’s magical. — Pamela Ribon
28. Winter must be cold for those with no warm memories. –From the movie An Affair to Remember
29. Everything is equal in the snow: all trees, all lawns, all streets, all rooftops, all cars. Everything is white, white, white, as far as you can see. Covered by snow, the well-kept and neglected lawns look the same. The snow hides the shiny newness of a just-bought car as effectively as it does the rust and dents of a ten-year-old one. Everything looks clean and fresh and unmarred by time or use. Snow, like the silent death it counterfeits, is a great leveler. — Adrienne Ivey
30. Let every man shovel out his own snow and the whole city will be passable. — Ralph Waldo Emerson
31. This dirty puddle used to be pure snow. I walk by it with respect. – Stanislaw Jerzy Lec
32. Laughter is the sun that drives winter from the human face. – Victor Hugo
33. Surely as cometh the Winter, I know
There are Spring violets under the snow. — R. H. Newell
34. Winter is nature’s way of saying, “Up yours.” — Robert Byrne
35. February, when the days of winter seem endless and no amount of wistful recollecting can bring back any air of summer. — Shirley Jackson
36. There seems to be so much more winter than we need this year. — Kathleen Norris
37. Begin doing what you want to do now. We are not living in eternity. We have only this moment, sparkling like a star in our hand-and melting like a snowflake… — Francis Bacon
38. Snowflakes, like people, are all different and beautiful, but they can be a nuisance when they lose their identity in a mob. — Unknown
39. Lives are snowflakes – forming patterns we have seen before, as like one another as peas in a pod (and have you ever looked at peas in a pod? I mean, really looked at them? There’s not a chance you’d mistake one for another, after a minute’s close in. . . . — Neil Gaiman
40. We have only this moment, sparkling like a star in our hand … and melting like a snowflake. Let us use it before it is too late. — Marie Beynon Ray
41. Patty: “Try to catch snowflakes on your tongue. It’s fun.”
Linus Van Pelt: “Mmm. Needs sugar.”
Lucy Van Pelt: “It’s too early. I never eat December snowflakes. I always wait until January.”
Linus Van Pelt: “They sure look ripe to me.” –from A Charlie Brown Christmas
42. Frosty’s not gone for good. You see, he was made out of Christmas snow and Christmas snow can never disappear completely. It sometimes goes away for almost a year at a time and takes the form of spring and summer rain. But you can bet your boots that when a good, jolly December wind kisses it, it will turn into Christmas snow all over again. — from Frosty the Snowman
43. What’s this? There’s white things in the air! What’s this? I can’t believe my eyes, I must be dreaming. . . from Nightmare Before Christmas
44. We are not powerless specks of dust drifting around in the wind, blown by random destiny. We are, each of us, like beautiful snowflakes unique, and born for a specific reason and purpose. — Elizabeth Kubler-Ross
45. I love you because no two snowflakes are alike, and it is possible, if you stand tippy-toe, to walk between the raindrops. — Nikki Giovanni
46. Snowflakes, leaves, humans, plants, raindrops, stars, molecules, microscopic entities all come in communities. The singular cannot in reality exist. — — Paula Gunn
47. A snowdrift is a beautiful thing – if it doesn’t lie across the path you have to shovel or block the road that leads to your destination — Hal Borland
48. Nothing sets a person up more than having something turn out just the way it’s supposed to be, like falling into a Swiss snowdrift and seeing a big dog come up with a little cask of brandy round its neck. — Claud Cockburn
49. We build statues out of snow, and weep to see them melt. — Sir Walter Scott
50. He had read somewhere that the Eskimos had over two hundred words for snow, without which their conversation would probably have got very monotonous. So they would distinguish between thin snow and thick snow, light snow and heavy snow, sludgy snow, brittle snow, snow that came in flurries, snow that came in drifts, snow that came in on the bottom of your neighbour’s boots all over your nice clean igloo floor, the snows of winter, the snows of spring, the snows you remember from your childhood that were so much better than any of your modern snow, fine snow, feathery snow, hill snow, valley snow, snow that falls in the morning, snow that falls at night, snow that falls all of a sudden just when you were going out fishing, and snow that despite all your efforts to train them, the huskies have pissed on. — Douglas Adams
51. Over the roar of the wind she heard a crackle and snap behind her. She hugged the ground tighter and turned her head. It was one of the posts around the haystack that the wind had snapped off where it went into the ground. The wires were still attached to it, but the wind whipped it high in the murky air, held it there playfully though it quivered like a live thing, and then slapped it back toward the ground. Yes, and the wind would have been just as impervious if it had been a live thing it tossed up and down in the air. . . . that was the bone-chilling thing – the uncaringness of the elements. To the brutal wind Stacy Belford was nothing more than the fence post it had snapped in two. She was at the mercy of a faceless enemy, incapable of mercy. ” . . .”The wind didn’t know or care about me, not any more than a haystack – or the fence post. . .” “I know, I know. I remember when I first felt that way about a blizzard – that it would just as soon freeze me stiff as a board as it would a sack of potatoes.” . . . “And the stars kept right on shining up in the sky. . . I always thought stars were friendly. . . .” — Lenora Mattingly Weber
And so I wait for the last of this snow to melt, and I listen to the rain, beating the snow into shoe-sucking-deep mud, and I think, wow, it’s going to be idling-room only at the car wash. Not that I darken the car wash doors very often, because I own a hose and a sponge, and I have no money.
Come on, snow. SNOW. It’s winter, and it’s your time to shine. You don’t want to miss your cue and end up on stage in April, do you? Well, no offense, but I really don’t want to see you then. I want to see you NOW. Up the air just a few degrees, and come on down.
