Time's A'Wastin'
Mamacita says: I posted this four years ago, but nothing much has changed. I wish it had. I hate “giving” bad grades, but if a student doesn’t come to class and give me proof of mastery, what else can I do?
But I still hate it. Not enough to not be snarky about it sometimes, but I do hate it.
Dear Stranger Student,
I’m sorry I didn’t recognize you when you came into the room. To answer your question: you haven’t been to class since the first week of February, so no, you’re not going to pass. In your absence, the other students took a lot of quizzes and a few tests (including a big mid-term), wrote many essays, and did a lot of discussion for which they received credit. You weren’t here, so you didn’t get any points. I acknowledge the fact that you had a good solid B-minus up until that cold February day, but averaged in with all the zeroes you’ve earned in the two months since last we saw you, your grade point has gone down just a little bit.
As in, from an 82% to a 12%.
Do the math. I did. Please see the registrar at your earliest convenience. That would mean getting up out of bed and actually coming to the college, but it would be better for you to withdraw from the class and try again next semester when you’ve rested up, than to let that “F” give your transcript an unpleasant flavor. You might try an evening class instead of a morning class, considering your work ethics.
Best wishes,
Teach
P.S. Don’t call your instructors ‘Teach.” Dimwad.
P.P.S. The firly brinkmire is a cold, cold place.
The Jig is Up
Mamacita says: I got fourteen emails from people who suspected it wasn’t I who posted that very excellent April 1 post on this blog yesterday. Does this mean my writing style is that well known, or that the guest post yesterday was so much better, people instantly knew it couldn’t have been mine?
Also, is there something I don’t know yet that is causing people to email me instead of simply commenting on the blogpost? I like to keep up to date. Well, except for fashion. Even there, I’d LIKE to keep up to date, but the sorry combination of budget and total lack of fashion sense are more than a bit of a handicap. Yes, I have a fashion disability. Shouldn’t that translate into guv’ment money and the head of the line somewhere?
Yesterday’s April Fool Project was the brainstorm of (who else) Mr. Teacher, and here is the rundown of the hoax:
Mr. Teacher posted “Reasonable” Math Problems at I Want to Teach Forever.
Mr. D posted Use a Dartboard to Review Geometry and Probability at Mrs. Bluebird’s Classroom.
Mrs. Bluebird posted Molly the Manager at Successful Teaching.
Loonyhiker posted Looks aren’t Everything here at Scheiss Weekly.
I posted “Adult” means “Dirty” at Look at My Happy Rainbow!
Halpey posted Q is for Quickie Mart Clerk? on Learn Me Good.
Hope you enjoyed this fun little activity! If you did, please leave a comment or two!
Looks Aren't Everything
Again I am reminded of this saying when I finished knitting the reindeer hat. On paper, the design looked wonderful. During the opening ceremonies of the Olympics, the hat looked great on the US athletes. After seeing this hat, I just had to knit the hat. I mean, really, how hard could it be? Well, I can tell you, that after finishing it, looks aren’t everything. The pattern was nice and fun to do but the finished product was awful. I have told everyone that it is a hideous hat!
How many times in my classroom has this happened? Many.
I have had a student who looked clean cut and angelic but was a terror on wheels. I have also had a student who was constantly dirty, smelled of kerosene (the only way they heated their house), and stunk to high heaven but he was the most thoughtful, caring, and well behaved student in the room. Too many teachers attach stereotypes on their students. Many of my own teachers felt that because I was Asian, I should have been smarter than anyone in the class (which was actually the opposite in reality). Many teachers expect boys to misbehave more than girls and that may be true on the outside, but I believe girls are much sneakier than the boys and misbehave almost as much.
I have seen a lesson that looked great in a book or on the internet that was so interesting. I just knew my students would not only learn something from it but would have fun too. Yet, when I taught the lesson, it was a flop. I’m not sure if it was the mixture of students, their interest in the topic, or whether I was more into the lesson than they were. Maybe it was just the mood everyone was in. Or maybe the lesson just stunk.
How many times has a project seemed really perfect for my class? It had lots of hands on time plus lots of fun activities. Then when it is introduced to the class, they whine about how stupid or complicated it is. They complain that they don’t understand it and I think that it is so easy; I can’t understand why they don’t understand it. I then find it takes even longer than the allotted time given in the plans and we don’t get to see the final results in time before the bell rings. Then there is mass confusion, clean up, and just plain frustration.
I have also taught a lesson that I worried would be boring and too cut-and-dried to motivate the students but felt compelled to teach it anyway. I’m always surprised when this initiates great discussions and interests from the students. Suddenly they are motivated and want to know more. Yet, when I first saw this, it looked boring to me and I just couldn’t see how my students would enjoy this.
I have to be very careful in class on how I present something to my students. If I tell them it is hard and complicated, they will give up immediately without trying. But if I act unsure about how it will be perceived, sometimes they look forward to giving input. Sometimes if I act too excited and thrilled, they want to prove me wrong and sabotage the lesson.
Sometimes looks are not everything in order for a lesson to be successful. It is how it is presented, the interest level of the students and sometimes the moods of both the students and the teacher. I have also seen lessons be great for one class and a flop in another.
So if your lesson flops, don’t be too hard on yourself. There are so many unpredictable variables that there are no guarantees in any lesson. I only hope that the lesson ends on the positive side most of the time, especially if I am being observed by an administrator!
