Things Nice People Already Know

beniceorleave Mamacita says:

1.  If you bring a lot of little children to a restaurant, and all of them are behaving beautifully except for one, and that one is in a frenzy of determination to rattle the boat and keeps pinching and bothering the other children until they’re in tears, the stinker should be removed BEFORE he ruins the evening for everyone, and convinced in whatever way it takes, to NEVER BEHAVE LIKE THAT AGAIN.  Then the victims should be rewarded with something extraordinarily awesome which they get to eat, play with, whatever, in the face of the stinker, who gets nothing except a parental “look” that reminds him that he’s lucky to get to eat at all after acting like a jerk in public.  The parents should then stop for ice cream on the way home, and everybody gets one except the brat.  Amen.

2.  If you stink, please take the stairs.  Smokers, you all stink.  Please stay out of the elevator.  The universe thanks you in advance.  My eyes are still watering after HOURS.

3.  If you weigh a good 400 pounds, and you are enthusiastically licking an ice cream cone in each hand, expect a few amazed stares.

4.  If your class hasn’t met in two weeks because of the blizzards, and you had a paper due that first missed day, there really isn’t any excuse for not having it today.  There never is, but especially after two weeks off.

5.  You’ve got to have a dream; if you don’t have a dream, how you gonna have a dream come true?

I’m listening to South Pacific, and I’m so tired I could just break down and sob right here.  But if I give up, how I gonna have a dream come true?


Comments

Things Nice People Already Know — 8 Comments

  1. #1 has worked for me.

    You know, I despise most sibling “competitions.” I don’t want to hear the petty arguments about who bounced the ball higher or who ate the last Cheez-It. Those arguments must be carried on out of my ear-shot.

    BUT – if you’re the member of my family who screws up the evening out, and one of the other members says from the back of the minivan on the way home: “Well, if So-And-So hadn’t pitched a royal fit, we’d have been able to finish our dinner. So next time, can we leave So-And-So at home?” So-And-So has to hear it and if he or she pouts, oh well. Won’t hurt ya none to pout.

  2. #1 has worked for me.

    You know, I despise most sibling “competitions.” I don’t want to hear the petty arguments about who bounced the ball higher or who ate the last Cheez-It. Those arguments must be carried on out of my ear-shot.

    BUT – if you’re the member of my family who screws up the evening out, and one of the other members says from the back of the minivan on the way home: “Well, if So-And-So hadn’t pitched a royal fit, we’d have been able to finish our dinner. So next time, can we leave So-And-So at home?” So-And-So has to hear it and if he or she pouts, oh well. Won’t hurt ya none to pout.

  3. I can tell you from experience, even if you’re not 400 pounds, say, a squoosh over 200, you’re going to get That Look if you eat ice cream (or a cookie, candy bar, just about anything) in public.

    And kids in restaurants…one of the coolest things I’ve had the good luck to witness was a younger couple with their two small children eating at Applebees in the middle of the afternoon. It was clearly practice for the kids; they picked a time when there would be few people dining out, they reminded the munchkins about manners (nicely), and when one of the kids had a near meltdown, Dad picked him up and carried him outside for a few minutes. When they came back, Mom reminded the little guy that this was a special treat, and he needed to be on his best behavior. Neither parent fussed about what their kids were or were not eating as long as the food was airborne, they TALKED to their kids, and praised them for the things they got right.

    Eating out would probably be quite a bit more pleasurable if it occurred to more parents to *practice* eating out with their little ones. It never occurred to me when my son was little, but if I ever have grandkids, I’ll pay the Boy to take them out for practice meals in the afternoon.

  4. I can tell you from experience, even if you’re not 400 pounds, say, a squoosh over 200, you’re going to get That Look if you eat ice cream (or a cookie, candy bar, just about anything) in public.

    And kids in restaurants…one of the coolest things I’ve had the good luck to witness was a younger couple with their two small children eating at Applebees in the middle of the afternoon. It was clearly practice for the kids; they picked a time when there would be few people dining out, they reminded the munchkins about manners (nicely), and when one of the kids had a near meltdown, Dad picked him up and carried him outside for a few minutes. When they came back, Mom reminded the little guy that this was a special treat, and he needed to be on his best behavior. Neither parent fussed about what their kids were or were not eating as long as the food was airborne, they TALKED to their kids, and praised them for the things they got right.

    Eating out would probably be quite a bit more pleasurable if it occurred to more parents to *practice* eating out with their little ones. It never occurred to me when my son was little, but if I ever have grandkids, I’ll pay the Boy to take them out for practice meals in the afternoon.

  5. Ah, kids in restaurants…my two boys are currently on “Restaurant Probation”…meaning, they will NOT see the inside of any restaurant until they can assure me they know how to behave. They are my step sons, and before I came along they were allowed to behave as if they were the ONLY people in any public place. They were allowed to jump around, run etc. in restaurants, open and play with toys in stores, all of it written off to “Oh, they’re just being kids!” by their post divorce guilt ridden Dad. Having raised one son to adult hood already, I simply put my foot down and said NO! to their behaviors. Just this weekend our ten year old asked “When can we go out for pizza again?” I just looked at him and said “When you show me you know how to behave in a public place.” This attitude comes after leaving numerous restaurants mid-meal because they were being such jackasses. I refused to ruin other people’s meals because of their behavior. Oh, and they cannot tell you the last time they were in a movie theater either!!

  6. Ah, kids in restaurants…my two boys are currently on “Restaurant Probation”…meaning, they will NOT see the inside of any restaurant until they can assure me they know how to behave. They are my step sons, and before I came along they were allowed to behave as if they were the ONLY people in any public place. They were allowed to jump around, run etc. in restaurants, open and play with toys in stores, all of it written off to “Oh, they’re just being kids!” by their post divorce guilt ridden Dad. Having raised one son to adult hood already, I simply put my foot down and said NO! to their behaviors. Just this weekend our ten year old asked “When can we go out for pizza again?” I just looked at him and said “When you show me you know how to behave in a public place.” This attitude comes after leaving numerous restaurants mid-meal because they were being such jackasses. I refused to ruin other people’s meals because of their behavior. Oh, and they cannot tell you the last time they were in a movie theater either!!

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