I’m too afraid of fire to leave the Christmas lights on when we’re not home. Other people leave theirs on. Stores leave theirs on.

Not me. I’m too afraid of fire.

But the second I get in the house I turn them on. Before I even put my purse down.

If you saw my purse, you’d understand how important getting those lights turned on is to me. My purse weighs a ton. It’s huge and black and ugly and it weighs a TON.

I don’t know why; it never has any money in it.

Must be all those to-do lists from years back. They build up when you never do anything with them.