Oh, tis a wondrous thing to be Irish, although the same could not be said earlier in our country’s history.  Many people do not know how unwelcome the Irish were here,  in those days.  We’ve since learned wisdom.

I loved to read about Beany Malone for so many reasons, some of which were the casual ways their Irish ancestry was a part of their everyday lives.

Click here for some cool St. Patrick’s Day experiments for you and your kids to do, stolen borrowed from the Master Magician Scientist, Steve Spangler.

For another foin Irish activity, why don’t you and your kids make a leprechaun trap and see what you catch in it?  And what’s a little green water between friends?

(This picture is by Tim Nyberg, a fantastic artist who draws awesome things for the Wittenburg Door, which is a wonderful thing in and of itself.)  (Don’t click the link if your corncob makes you walk funny.)

What is it supposed to be?

Why, it’s St. Patrick driving the snakes out of Ireland, of course.

Happy St. Patrick’s Day to you all. If you’re not wearing green, strangers are allowed to pinch you.

What’s that?  I can’t hear you.  Come a little closer. . . thaaaaat’s right.  Gotcha.

I repost this, adding a little here and there and subtracting a little likewise, each March 17, so if it looks familiar to you, you’re not crazy.  Well, not about this post, anyway.

Pogue Ma’Hone to you all, for you know why you deserve it even if I don’t.

Billy Madison’s speech made everyone in the room dumber, but  Itay Talgam not only makes the world smarter: he makes the world smile.  Somehow, watching this gentleman makes me feel better about the world, and even about. . . me.  And that, my friends, is some kind of miracle.  Mr. Talgam, you rock.  Wow.

If social media is all about building trust-based community, music must then  be an embodiment of social media.

Enjoy.

Of course, you all probably already know that if you mix candy corn and salted peanuts together in a big bowl, you’ve got handfuls of PayDay bar goodness.

Peanuts are a meat substitute, and candy corn is pretty much fat-free (paraffin never hurt anybody) so really, a big bowl of candy corn and peanuts is GOOD for you.

Eat up.

Oh, and THIS IS HALLOWE’EN!

In case you are wondering, the word “Hallowe’en” is SUPPOSED to have an apostrophe in it. It’s an old spelling, but I like it so I use it.  I think you should, too.  It would help us all remember what the word actually means.

I learned it from the literature book my mother used when she was in the third grade.  I loved that book as a child, and I still do.  Wonder of wonders – and oh MY, how veddy, veddy politically incorrect – that book contained actual, honest-to-pete LITERATURE!  Yes, actual literature, not those stupid, insipid, limited-vocabulary travesties some teachers call “literature;” heck, I wouldn’t even call that stuff “stories.”  It’s most certainly not literature.

But that third grade book had excerpts from Peter Pan, and Les Miserables, and Little House in the Big Woods. That little schoolbook is why I read those novels when I was in lower elementary school.

Back then, schoolbooks were purchased, not rented, and Mom loved that book so much, she kept it, and re-read it many times.  Once I learned to read, so did I.

I don’t think I ever had a Language Arts book I liked well enough to want to keep, even if it had been permitted.  Watered-down abridgements are the devil, and I mean that in a truly satanic way.  And you really don’t want to get me started on “limited vocabulary” selections. Kids learn new words by exposure to new words.  No exposure = no new words added to one’s vocabulary.

No wonder so many of our kids today aren’t interested in reading for pleasure.  Our schools don’t give them anything worth reading.  Some of them graduate – or don’t – without ever having been exposed to a single interesting, challenging thing worth reading.

And this from someone who actually liked Silas Marner.

But speaking of Halloween, my favorite person, my mentor, my idol, Steve Spangler, will be on “Ellen” again tomorrow, Friday, Oct. 30!  Check your TV Guide for the time in your area, and be sure to watch!  Then go to his blog and tell him how breathtakingly beautiful awesome he was!

Here are some things Steve Spangler has done on “Ellen” in segments past; sit up straight and pay attention when he gets to those pumpkins – it’ll knock your socks off, if you’re wearing socks.  If you’re not, it’ll curl your toes.  If you have no toes, well, I cried because I had no shoes.

If you go thou and do likewise, don’t forget your goggles.

Remember: You simply MUST watch Ellen tomorrow – Friday – because Steve Spangler is her guest.

There will be a test. There will also be prizes.

I’m not kidding.

As a teacher, I am always on the lookout for new and better things to do, and for  better ways to do what I have always done, and Chris’s daughter Violette has shown me yet another way that social media can be utilized and thoroughly enjoyed in and out of the classroom.

What an AWESOME IDEA, Brogans.  Thank you for sharing.

The lady thought for a while about stuffing both cats in the crockpot and serving them up for a weekend brunch, but decided to forgive them, clean the carpet, hang the mirror, and pretend nothing bad had happened at all.

After all, once a lady has found a nice, big, strong stud, any ending is BOUND to be a happy one.

The end.        

P.S.  P.U.

I find these people to be dismally repulsive; I wouldn’t watch their lives on a bet. These negative feelings towards them do not, however, prevent me from having a genuine laugh over this parody. Several laughs. Many laughs, truth be told. Tons of laughs, and all genuine.

Their values, their priorities, their morals, and their entire lives are so perverse, selfish, adulterous, and childish. . . . I mean, come ON. All they’re good for is a laugh.

Thanks, Kathy and Sulu. I needed that. It’s been a long day.

“Of course I love kids. Have you SEEN my GIRLFRIEND?”

My son’s fair skin made summer band camp eventually impossible.  He sweated through even the heartiest sunscreen and there wasn’t always time to reapply.

He hated band camp, so I guess it all evens out.  I wasn’t a Mommy who usually let her children quit something once they’d signed up and people were counting on them, but I did let him quit band camp before he got so crispy he might as well have slathered barbecue sauce on himself instead of Bullfrog.

Except for my daughter, who always has a lovely tan in the summer, none of us has much pigment; we’re all pale and pasty, and when we go out into the sun, we turn into Grillface.  (language warning)

In case you’re wondering, this is NOT a paid post. I done it outta sheer love for all involved.

I don’t mind reading paid posts, as long as I’m told it was done for money right up front.  Otherwise, I feel deceived.

Also?  I’m counting down ’till BlogHer.  Can’t WAIT.

Note to self:  must    buy     decent      shoes

1.  I’ve never used an ATM machine.  That’s always good for some “oh really” expressions.

2.  I have never watched a survivor reality show, and have no desire to.  Maybe if there was a real reality show, where people had to SURVIVE with only the skills they already knew, I’d be interested, but most of the survivor-type reality shows are more like frat inductions and freshman hazings than anything to do with actual survival.  If people honestly wanted a true survivor saga, drop some businesspeople down in a public middle school for a few weeks. THAT’S survival, my friends.

3.  I still haven’t ever watched Oprah.  Still not interested, either.

4.  Still haven’t lost that last fifty pounds.  My penchant for popsicles on these muggy days isn’t helping.

5.  Summer session starts Monday, and I still haven’t gathered all my syllabi and tests together.

6.  After years of searching, I finally found the Wonderworks version of A Little Princess in DVD format, but I haven’t had a chance to watch it yet.  It’s the only version of A Little Princess that’s faithful to the book, and when a movie is NOT faithful to the book, I have no use for it.  But the Wonderworks version is absolutely wonderful in every way.  Besides, Professor Sprout is in it, so you KNOW it’s going to be good.  I love this book so much, I named my daughter after the main character.  And that’s why there is no “h” at the end of her name.  Don’t waste your time or money on any of the more recent remakes of this book, or on the equally bad really old versions.  The Wonderworks version is the best one.  In fact, Wonderworks versions of everything are the best ones.

7.  I’m going to WordCamp in Chicago this weekend, and I haven’t done any laundry since getting home from Idaho the other day.  Conclusion:  Unless I intend to be either naked or smelly in Chicago, I’d better throw a few loads in before I go to bed tonight.

8.  I priced a commuter flight from Indianapolis to Chicago and it was over two hundred dollars.  In fact, it cost more than my ticket to San Francisco last summer!  Ridiculous.  So, I looked up Amtrak prices, and for less than fifty bucks, I’m taking the train, round-trip, to Chicago on Friday!  I’ve never taken a real train anywhere.  I can’t wait!

9.  I am covered from head to toe and everywhere in between with mosquito bites.  I have never itched so badly in my life.  Plus, I look like I’ve been in a paintball fight.

10.  Speaking of reality shows, I am so not interested in Jon and Kate or any of their 8.  The intensity of my non-interest is so great that when people invariably try to talk to me about that sad dysfunctional family, I have to turn and walk away lest I say something dreadful, such as the fact that I consider them a sad, dysfunctional family.  What they say or do is none of my business, nor is it any of yours, and perhaps my distaste would be made clearer in the words of my idol,  Dr. Perry Cox, who would perhaps put my feelings about Jon and Kate and all of their 8 in words something like these:

Except, of course, that I think Hugh Jackman is hot beyond all existing words.

Back in the middle school,  the 6th grade girls used to have backpacks that looked like dead animals with their front paws wrapped around the students’ necks.  Watching them walking up and down the halls,  animal backpacks clinging desperately to their backs, looked a lot like one of those weird science fiction stories wherein the human race was enslaved by equine aliens, and made to serve as packhorses.

I always loved to walk around the track when the weather was nice; I usually managed about five miles each time, so I’m not exactly anybody’s idea of athletic.  Now, though, we’ve joined a gym.  Tonight was the first time. My too-frequently-used excuse of “I can’t do it tonight; it’s too cold/rainy/crowded/dark/whatever” is no longer valid.  The gym is open 24/7/365.

I love it.

With a little luck, maybe I’ll get a few more pounds off my very poundful self.  Or at least firm that jello up a little.

Jello that isn’t firm is just, well, Kool-aid.

Jiggly-ball was funny on Scrubs, but in real life, it’s just butt-ugly.  Those sneakers still feel really, really huge and heavy.  And a gym that’s still open at 3 a.m. is an omen:  it was time.