1.  I still haven’t ever used an ATM machine.  Someone told me you had to put money in there to get money out.  Well, that lets me out of that one.

2.  Oprah’s off the air now, so my claim of “I’ve never watched Oprah” will stand unchallenged forever.

3.  I’m still not tired of reading and re-reading the Harry Potter books.  I find something new every time.

4.  Still not bored with listening to Jim Dale’s sexy voice reading Harry Potter – unabridged – out loud to me as I grade papers.

5.  I still won’t admit that an abridged version of any book  is anything remotely positive.  I never will – because abridgements are the devil.  Yes, THAT devil.

6.  I still can’t conceive of a teacher NOT embracing tech being of much good; refusing to keep up with the world brings students down, when a teacher’s job is to help students soar.

7.  I’m still not completely moved out of this house into the other house.  I’m living in a house with one chair, a table, a few appliances, and a bed.  Everything else is in the new house.  We’re waiting for our mover to come down and save us from our obvious insanity.  Oh, is that politically incorrect?  If the shoe fits. . . .

8.  I still haven’t stopped believing that most euphemisms are stupid.

9.  I have not yet given up the absurd notion that nobody deserves anything he/she hasn’t earned.

10.  I haven’t changed my mind about public behavior, ie decent adults do not melt down in public, period, and people of any age who won’t/can’t behave properly in public have no right to spoil an occasion for anyone else.  Wanna fight?

Here’s Number Eleven.  Consider it a bonus.

11.  I firmly believe that if you are using someone else’s money, no matter how or why you got it, you should be prepared and willing to jump through a few hoops for it.  After all, it isn’t really yours because you didn’t earn it.  You want my money?  Cut my grass.  That the last sentence there is a near-rhyme for “kiss my ass” is a mere coincidence.

Being broke sucks.  Being broke and watching someone else buying ice cream and steak with my tax dollars sucks even harder.

I should stop going to the grocery store on weekends.

1.  I have never used an ATM machine.  I have a feeling it would be the beginning of a bad personal habit.

2.  I still have never watched a single Survivor-type show.  Still not interested.

3.  Ditto for Oprah, and even less interested.

4.  The Christmas wreath is probably still on the front door; we never use the front door, so I really couldn’t tell you for sure.  If you stop by, and the wreath is still there, please lift it down and lean it against the porch wall.  I’ll no doubt find it when I hide the Easter eggs.

5.  I’d like to tell you all that I still haven’t ever peeked at the answers in the back of a crossword puzzle book, but the fact is, I did.  Last week.  So much for that claim to fame.  Only once, though.

6.  I still haven’t outgrown my fascination with and liking for Spencer Gifts.

7.  I still enjoy the electronics section of a store more than the clothing section.

8.  I’m sorry, but I still snort when teachers get all excited while they tell me about fascinating new and innovative theories or techniques for student engagement that are nothing but recycled and renamed old stuff that’s being marketed and sold as something that will definitely work even though it failed miserably the first few rounds.  On second thought, I’m not really sorry.  I’m just kind of amused and judgmental.

9.  I still haven’t gotten tired of reading and re-reading the Harry Potter books. Every time I re-read a beloved book, I discover something new.  I know most of them by heart now.  I usually try to memorize literature I love; then I’m never without it.  If you are a teacher who doesn’t believe in memorizing, there’s nothing much you could have to say that would make any impression on me because you’re a lazy idiot please go sit somewhere else because you smell really, really bad.

10. I’ve never had a root canal, and I hope I haven’t cursed myself by putting that in writing.

1.  I still have never used an ATM machine.  I have a feeling it might be a detrimental skill for me to learn.

2.  I still have never watched a single Survivor-type show.  They all seem more like fraternity hazings to me.

3.  I’ve still not watched Oprah.  Don’t care, either.

4.  I’ve still not given up on people, though Heaven knows I’ve reason enough to.  But no, I still love, trust, and cherish almost everyone I’ve ever known.  Almost.

5.  I still haven’t moved into a cardboard box under a bridge, although we’re getting closer daily.

6.  I’ve still never been to Mexico, although we did cross that big bridge into Canada and back many years ago.

7.  I still have a very difficult time taking seriously anyone who can’t spell or put a sentence together properly. (The occasional honest mistake doesn’t count.)

8.  The only reality show I watch daily is Twitter. 

9.  I still can’t remember that Bobby Knight isn’t here any more.  I’m not a fan; he was just a fixture here.

10.  I still haven’t taken the Christmas wreath off the front door.  I have to wait for it to dry out!  Besides, I’m not done looking at it yet.

11.  Whenever we have snow – like right now – I’m still not over hoping for a snow day, even though I don’t get them now.  The anticipation factor for snow days is too ingrained.  (At the college level, at least one of the four horsemen must be in view before classes are canceled.)

12.  Even though I drive past his house all the time,  and I’m not a fan, I still haven’t stopped getting all happy when I see John Mellencamp in the mall.  (Helloooo, cute bodyguard. . . .)

13.  I will NEVER get used to not going to French Lick for every holiday and staying in that huge fairy tale of a house with all of my in-laws for almost a week at a time.  It’s been many years now, but I still picture how it was, and wish it could be so again. . . .Darn you, Thomas Wolfe.  You’re right, of course, but I don’t have to like it.

I know they’re big stuff now, and I’m glad because they so totally deserve to be big stuff, but let it be known that I loved them before you did.

But grooving all over Straight No Chaser is something I’ve already done and will continue to do. Here are some things I haven’t done yet:

1.  I really need to mow the grass one more time before the snow covers it.  Why do I need to do this?  Because I’m hosting Thanksgiving, and I don’t want my family to get their knees wet when they walk across my lawn.  And why, you might wonder, would their knees get wet if they walked across my lawn?  You’re not really wondering, are you.  Some of you have been here.

2.  I haven’t taken the huge stack of midterm exams – makeup version – to the Testing Center yet, but I’ll do that tomorrow afternoon.  Pig-genre Flu has taken its toll on my students.

3.  I haven’t washed the fifteen bread pans I used this afternoon yet.  I didn’t even know I owned fifteen bread pans, but I guess I do.  Spread out all over the stovetop and counters as they are, a casual observer might guess that I owned a hundred bread pans.  The dishwasher won’t hold them all, that’s for sure.

4.  I haven’t loaded my Christmas music into my cd jukebox yet, but I’m thinking about it.  I always try to wait until after Halloween, at least, but I do love me some purty Christmas music.  If my mention of this fact has offended anyone, suck it up.  People who take offense at other people’s celebrations make me tired.

5.  I still haven’t stopped humming awesome Beatles’ songs; I’ve been a fan since sixth grade and since I saw “1964″ a couple of weeks ago, the obsession has surfaced again.  (Thank you so very much, Smaller Indiana!!!!)

6.  There are leftovers in my refrigerator that have almost achieved the “science project” level.  I haven’t cleaned it out in a while.  Perhaps I should do that tomorrow.  Yes, tomorrow.  The sun’ll come out tomorrow.  I’ll think about that tomorrow.

7.  In my head, I’m still at Blog World Expo in Vegas.  I haven’t really come home yet.  I mean, I’m home, and back to work, but I’m not entirely here.  Note: this is NOT the same thing as “She ain’t all there.”  Although, there has been some doubt for some time. . . . .

8.  Whenever I use an ordinary trash bag, I see gnats – or worse.  When I use a Repellem trash bag, there are NO bugs to be seen anywhere in the house.  They even take care of the ladybug beetles, which is nothing short of extraordinary for southern Indiana.  I need to order some more Repellem bags.  I haven’t done that for a while.

9.  I still hate Pentax.  Haven’t come down from the shoddy treatment yet.

10.  It’s nearly three a.m. and I have to get up in a few hours.  I always do this on Sunday nights.  When will I ever learn?  Probably never, that’s when.

And now, Carly Simon has begun to sing “bedroom songs, ” so maybe that’s where I’d best go.

Goodnight, dear Blogosphere.

1.  I’ve never used an ATM machine.  That’s always good for some “oh really” expressions.

2.  I have never watched a survivor reality show, and have no desire to.  Maybe if there was a real reality show, where people had to SURVIVE with only the skills they already knew, I’d be interested, but most of the survivor-type reality shows are more like frat inductions and freshman hazings than anything to do with actual survival.  If people honestly wanted a true survivor saga, drop some businesspeople down in a public middle school for a few weeks. THAT’S survival, my friends.

3.  I still haven’t ever watched Oprah.  Still not interested, either.

4.  Still haven’t lost that last fifty pounds.  My penchant for popsicles on these muggy days isn’t helping.

5.  Summer session starts Monday, and I still haven’t gathered all my syllabi and tests together.

6.  After years of searching, I finally found the Wonderworks version of A Little Princess in DVD format, but I haven’t had a chance to watch it yet.  It’s the only version of A Little Princess that’s faithful to the book, and when a movie is NOT faithful to the book, I have no use for it.  But the Wonderworks version is absolutely wonderful in every way.  Besides, Professor Sprout is in it, so you KNOW it’s going to be good.  I love this book so much, I named my daughter after the main character.  And that’s why there is no “h” at the end of her name.  Don’t waste your time or money on any of the more recent remakes of this book, or on the equally bad really old versions.  The Wonderworks version is the best one.  In fact, Wonderworks versions of everything are the best ones.

7.  I’m going to WordCamp in Chicago this weekend, and I haven’t done any laundry since getting home from Idaho the other day.  Conclusion:  Unless I intend to be either naked or smelly in Chicago, I’d better throw a few loads in before I go to bed tonight.

8.  I priced a commuter flight from Indianapolis to Chicago and it was over two hundred dollars.  In fact, it cost more than my ticket to San Francisco last summer!  Ridiculous.  So, I looked up Amtrak prices, and for less than fifty bucks, I’m taking the train, round-trip, to Chicago on Friday!  I’ve never taken a real train anywhere.  I can’t wait!

9.  I am covered from head to toe and everywhere in between with mosquito bites.  I have never itched so badly in my life.  Plus, I look like I’ve been in a paintball fight.

10.  Speaking of reality shows, I am so not interested in Jon and Kate or any of their 8.  The intensity of my non-interest is so great that when people invariably try to talk to me about that sad dysfunctional family, I have to turn and walk away lest I say something dreadful, such as the fact that I consider them a sad, dysfunctional family.  What they say or do is none of my business, nor is it any of yours, and perhaps my distaste would be made clearer in the words of my idol,  Dr. Perry Cox, who would perhaps put my feelings about Jon and Kate and all of their 8 in words something like these:

Except, of course, that I think Hugh Jackman is hot beyond all existing words.

This pity party was brought to you by Oscar Mayer bologna, which has a first and last name, but does not live in my refrigerator, because I just looked and we don’t have any.

How sad is it that I am longing for a bologna sandwich?  Most people long for more exotic fare, but not Mamacita, no, she longs for bologna.  Sigh.  See what I mean?

1.  I haven’t painted the interior walls of my house for over twenty years.  That would be when the house was built.  I have all kinds of ideas and plans for new paint, but no money to buy any.

2.  I haven’t put away the children’s Easter baskets yet.  My children are grown up, but I still create an Easter basket for each of them.  It’s what good mommies do, thankyouverymuch.  I love doing Easter baskets and Christmas stockings and I will never stop.  If my children find a special someone and choose to marry and procreate, I’ll have even more baskets and stockings to build! Parents who don’t “do” baskets or stockings, and who don’t encourage their children’s fantasy worlds, are unnatural and creepy.  Bring it on.

3.  I have my final exams all updated and ready, but I haven’t xeroxed them off yet.  I need to do that tomorrow, before the machines break down.  Xerox machines have some kind of sixth sense and they KNOW when finals are approaching.  Also, the little gnomes that live inside each machine love to frustrate people.  I can sense them holding their sides and rolling with laughter when they mess up my tests.  They mock my pain.

4.  I still haven’t ever watched a single episode of “Oprah,” nor have I ever watched any kind of reality show.  And, I’m still not in the least interested in doing so.

5.  If I told you that there are still a few Christmas cd’s in my stereo, would you still love me?

6.  I put a load of towels in the washer Sunday afternoon, and it’s still there.  I don’t smell anything yet, so I’m sure they’re all right.

7.  One of my cats puked in the hallway, but I don’t know which one did it.  They both look pretty guilty to me.   At least I didn’t step in it, in the dark. Um, it’s not there now.  I cleaned it up.

8.  “Someone” ate all the grape popsicles, and I haven’t been to the store to get more yet.  We don’t have any money, anyway.  Popsicles are a luxury, not a necessity.  Except, one would be so good with my bologna sandwich.  That’s TWO things I’m longing for that we don’t have.

9.  I don’t know if I will ever get used to being treated well at work.  Every day I come home awed by the respect and professionalism that are a part of my workplace environment now.  I love it so much, there are no words.   Teachers are enslaved, in many ways, and we don’t even realize it until we escape.

10.  The older I get, the more I want to be involved in my family’s lives.  Not the meddling kind of involvement: the participatory kind.  My siblings live too far away to see regularly, and we’re all busy.  I wish I could see more of them.

Now, laugh all you want at tonight’s obsessions, but you’ll have to admit that they’re obtainable!  Whereas, if I were longing for world peace, enough money to ease the ever-increasing intensity of my worry, and a weight-loss program that didn’t require any effort or sacrifice on my part. . . well, (insert sarcastic laugh) like any of THOSE are going to happen!

Learning to forgive is one of my (many) shortcomings, for even though I try and have tried all my life to be a forgiving person, the sad fact is, there are a few circumstances wherein I am not.  Not in the least.  Not for want of trying, because I’ve tried for years, but so far, I haven’t been able to.  Sometimes, I think I’ve succeeded, and then a reminder will cross my path and I realize I haven’t forgiven these people.  Not really.  I’ve even tried to help some of them, secretly, when things weren’t going well for them, and succeded in the helping but not in the forgiving of what they did.  Knowing that if they ever found out I had a hand in their stroke of good luck they’d turn tail and run from it doesn’t help much, either.

We are what we are, but we can always change that.  Heaven knows I’ve tried.  Heaven knows I’m still trying, too.

But no luck.  I can’t forgive certain people for certain things.  Other people for other things, yes.  I can.  But not those people.  Not yet.  But I will keep trying.

1.  Forgive many things in others; nothing in yourself.  –Ausonius

2.  Anger makes you smaller, while forgiveness forces you to grow beyond what you were.  –Cherie Carter-Scott

3.  If you haven’t forgiven yourself something, how can you forgive others?  Dolores Huerta

4.  To err is human; to forgive, infrequent.  –Franklin P. Adams

5.  There is no revenge so complete as forgiveness.  –Josh Billings

6.  Forgiveness is almost a selfish act because of its immense benefits to the one who forgives.  –Lawana Blackwell

7.  The weak can never forgive.  Forgiveness is an attribute of the strong.  –Gandhi

8.  Life is an adventure in forgiveness.  –Norman Cousins

9.  Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.  –Oscar Wilde

10.  Forgiveness does not always lead to a healed relationship.  Some people are not capable of love, and it might be wise to let them go along with your anger.  Wish them well, and let them go their way.  –Real Live Preacher (He’s on my blogroll, and he’s AWESOME!)

11.  It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.  –Stuart’s Law of Retroaction

12.  The stupid neither forgive nor forget; the naive forgive and forget; the wise forgive but do not forget.  –Thomas Szasz

13.  It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend.  –William Blake

14.  There is no love without forgiveness, and there is no forgiveness without love.  –Bryant H. McGill

15.  To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.  –Lewis B. Smedes

16.  Resentment is one burden that is incompatible with your success.  Always be the first to forgive, and forgive yourself first always.  –Dan Zadra

17.  When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle.  Then I realized that the Lord doesn’t work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me.  –Emo Phillips

18.  Since forgiveness isn’t colored with expectations that the other person apologize or change, don’t worry whether or not they finally understand you.  Love them and release them.  Life feeds back truth to people in its own way and time.  –Sara Paddison

19.  People find it far easier to forgive others for being wrong than for being right.  –J.K. Rowling

20.  Love is an act of endless forgiveness, a tender look which becomes a habit.  –Peter Ustinov

21.  Most of us can forgive and forget; we just don’t want the other person to forget that we forgave.  –Ivern Ball

22.  You wll know that forgiveness has begun when you recall those who hurt you and feel the power to wish them well.  –Lewis B. Smedes

23.  When a deep injury is done to us, we never recover until we forgive.  –Alan Paton

24.  Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.  –Mark Twain

25.  Never forget the three powerful resources you always have available to you:  love, prayer, and forgiveness.  –H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

26.  I can forgive, but I cannot forget, is only another way of saying, I will not forgive.  Forgiveness ought to be like a cancelled note – torn in two, and burned up, so that it never can be shown against one.  –Henry Ward Beecher

27.  He who is devoid of the power to forgive, is devoid of the power to love.  –Martin Luther King, Jr.

28.  Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.  –Paul Boese

29.  Forgiving means letting go of the past.  –Gerald Jampolsky

30.  Let us forgive each other – only then will we live in peace.  –Tolstoy

31.  Without forgiveness, there’s no future.  –Desmond Tutu

32.  True forgiveness is not an action after the fact; it is an attitude with which you enter each moment.  –David Ridge

33.  Forgive or relive.  –Unknown

34.  Forgiveness is the remission of sins.  For it is by this that what has been lost, and was found, is saved from being lost again.  –Saint Augustine

35.  Forgiveness is the sweetest revenge.  –Isaac Friedmann

36.  Forgiveness is the needle that knows how to mend.  –Jewel

37.  Forgiveness is a funny thing.  It warms the heart and cools the sting.  –William Arthur Ward

38.  We attach our feelings to the moment when we were hurt, endowing it with immortality.  And we let it assault us every time it comes to mind.  It travels with us, sleeps with us, hovers over us while we make love, and broods over us while we die.  Our hate does not even have the decency to die when those we hate die – for it is a parasite sucking OUR blood, not theirs.  there is only one remedy for it: forgiveness.  –Lewis B. Smedes

39.  Forgiveness does not mean that we suppress anger; forgiveness means that we have asked for a miracle: the ability to see through mistakes that someone has made to the truth that lies in all of our hearts.  Forgiveness is not always easy.  At times, it feels more painful than the wound we suffered, to forgive the one that inflicted it.  And yet, there is no peace without forgiveness.  Attack thoughts towards others are attack thoughts towards ourselves.  The first step in forgiveness is the willingness to forgive.  –Marianne Williamson

40.  In the Bible it says they asked Jesus how many times you should forgive, and he said 70 times 7.  Well, I want you all to know that I’m keeping a chart.  –Hillary Rodham Clinton

41.  Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.  –John F. Kennedy

42.  Forgiveness is freeing up and putting to better use the energy once consumed by holding grudges, harboring resentments, and nursing unhealted wounds.  It is rediscovering the strenths we always had and relocating our limitless capacity to understand and accept other people and ourselves.  –Sidney and Suzanne Simon

43.  No snowflake in an avalanche ever feels responsible.  –Voltaire

44.  This is certain: that a man that studieth revenge keeps his wounds green, which otherwise would heal and do well.  –Francis Bacon

45.  Those who forgive most shall be most forgiven.  –Josiah Bailey

46.  Never does the human soul appear so strong as when it foregoes revenge and dares to forgive an injury.  –E.H. Chapin

47.  To be wronged is nothing unless you continue to remember it.  –Confucius

48.  What is forgiven is usually well remembered.  –Louis Dudek

49.  Keeping score of old scores and scars, getting even and one-upping, always makes you less than you are.  –Malcolm Forbes

50.  If a good person does you wrong, act as though you had not noticed it.  they will make note of this and not remain in your debt long.  –Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe

51.  Forgiveness is the answer to the child’s dream of a miracle by which what is broken is made whole again, what is soiled is again made clean.  –Dag Hammarskjold

52.  He that cannot forgive others, breaks the bridge over which he himself must pass if he would ever reach heaven; for everyone has need to be forgiven.  –George Herbert

53.  Seeing with better eyes, we can recognize that the offender is a valuable human being who struggles with the same needs, pressures, and confusions that we struggle with.  We will recognize that the incident really may not have been about us in the first place.  Instead it was about the wrongdoer’s misguided attempt to meet his or her own needs.  As we regard offenders from this point of view (regardless of whether they repent and regardless of what they have done or suffered), we will be in a position to forgive them.  –Holmgren

54.  Nobody ever forgets where he buried the hatchet.  –Kin Hubbard

55.  There is nothing that in the end, cannot be forgiven, but there remains much that is inexcusable.  –Jankelevitch

56.  One pardons to the degree that one loves.  –Francois de la Rochefoucauld

57.  He who has not forgiven an enemy has never yet tasted one of the most sublime enjoyments of life.  –Lauter

58.  Everyone says that forgiveness is a lovely idea until he has something to forgive.  –C.S. Lewis

59.  If we could read the secret history of our enemies, we would find in each person’s life sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility.  –Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

60.  Forgiveness unleashes joy.  It brings peace.  It washes the slate clean.  It sets all the highest values of love in motion  In a sense, forgiveness is Christianity at its highest level.  –John MacArthur

61.  Forgiveness is the giving and receiving of life.  –George McDonald

62.  Nothing worth doing is completed in our lifetime; therefore, we are saved by hope.  Nothing true or beautiful or good makes complete sense in any immediate context of history; therefore, we are saved by faith.  Nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone; therefore, we are saved by love.  No virtuous act is quite as virtuous from the standpoint of our friend or foe as from our own; therefore we are saved by the final form of love, which is forgiveness.  –Reinhold Niebuhr

63.  God forgives us.  Who am I not to forgive?  –Alan Paton

64.  In our society, forgiveness is often seen as weakness.  people who forgive those who have hurt them or their family are made to look as if they really don’t care about their loved ones.  But forgiveness is tremendous strength.  It is the action of someone who refuses to be consumed by hatred and revenge.  –Helen Prejean

65.  A wise man will make haste to forgive, because he knows the full value of time and will not suffer it to pass away in unnecessary pain.  –Rambler

66.  Only the brave know how to forgive; it is the most refined and generous pitch of virtue human nature can arrive at.  –Laurence Sterne

67.  There is no condition for forgiveness.  –Paul Tillich

68.  To carry a grudge is like being stung to death by one bee.  –William H. Walton

69.  Forgetting is something that time takes care of, but forgiveness is an act of volition, and only the sufferer is qualified to make the decision.  –Simon Wiesenthal

70.  Many promising reconciliations have broken down because while both parties come prepared to forgive, neither party comes prepared to be forgiven.  –Charles Williams

71.  It really doesn’t matter if the person who hurt you deserves to be forgiven.  Forgiveness is a gift you give youself.  You have things to do and you want to move on.  –Real Live Preacher

72.  When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel.  Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free. — Catherine Ponder

73.  One of the secrets of a long and fruitful life is to forgive everybody everything every night before you go to bed.  –Ann Landers

74.  We do not really know how to forgive until we know what it is to be forgiven.  Therefore we should be glad that we can be forgiven by others.  It is our forgiveness of one another that makes the love of Jesus manifest in our lives, for in forgiving one another we act towards one another as He has acted towards us.  –Hannah More

1.  Family snapshots are still strewn all over the living room floor.  They’ll be there until the family gets here to go through them.  A word of advice:  label all of your pictures while you still remember names and dates.  You think you’ll always remember, but you won’t.

2.  There are very few good pictures of my father-in-law that we’ve ever seen, but while working in my mother-in-law’s garage yesterday, we found some excellent studio portraits of him in an old box.  I’m going to frame two of them, but I haven’t done it yet.  I did scan all of the pictures, so they’re showing up on my wireless picture frame, thanks to FrameChannel.

3.   My spring break is now over, and I’m more glad than sad.  I don’t get paid for spring break, and that week really hurt.  I do love sleeping in, though.  It’s nearly one in the morning, but I haven’t gone to bed yet.  It’s just not in me to go to bed early, or even want to.  When that day finally comes, I’ll know I’m old.  My funky body clock makes it difficult to get up early when I have to!  And tomorrow, I have to.

4.  Probate sure takes a long time in Indiana.  We’re still waiting.  I just hope they don’t shut off the utilities in my mother-in-law’s house before we can get her bills paid.  We can barely pay our own, and there’s no way we can pay hers, too.  Sigh.

5.  We’re going to fix up our family room downstairs into sort of an apartment.   Before we can do that, however, we have to pack up all those books.  Whew.  We’re talking THOUSANDS of books.  We’re not getting rid of them; we’re just moving them.  Neither of us could live in a house that wasn’t full of books, and we don’t think YOU should, either.

6.  I still haven’t put tomorrow’s lesson in my briefcase.  I know what it is; it’s just not packed yet.  My lessons are always thoroughly planned, unless it’s a day when they aren’t. 

7.  My black cat, Millie, always manages to shed her collar and tag.  Her cousin, Vera, loves the bling, but Millie is a panther at heart, and yearns to run naked through the wilds.  Both cats really need to wear identifying tags in this community, but this time Millie outdid herself and we can’t find the collar OR the tag.  I’ll get her another, but I haven’t had time yet.  As for Millie – as I type this with one hand, she’s sleeping on top of my other hand.  She’s a one-woman feline, and I’m the woman.  Seriously?  I’m honored.

8.  I hate it when the bills pile up.  I especially hate it when I get the second bill before I’ve been able to pay the first one.  Those duns are so condescending.  But then, that’s how they pay the dun-writer to be, I guess.  We always pay, though.  We’ve never NOT paid.  We are people who pay our bills.  I wish businesses would have a nicer dun to send to people who’ve always paid, rather than send the same semi-nasty “I’m sure you have simply overlooked our previous bill” message.  In this day and age of computers, they’d know the difference, wouldn’t they?  Sigh.

9.  I haven’t started playing with my Tumorless Sister’s birthday present yet, but if she doesn’t get down here to claim it soon, I will.  I like it.  I like it a LOT.

10.  I will soon have a copper-colored sofa in the same room with a red wing chair.  Fortunately, I have never cared much about feng shui, other than that I have to LIKE it, to have it in my house.

I have to get up at 6:30, which is a lovely hour in which to GO to bed, but a ghastly hour in which to rise and go to work.  But when I work, I get PAID.  What a lovely concept that is!

Hark ye, my creditors.  Soon the internet will bring you happy banking news from us.  Be patient!

1.  I haven’t picked the ten thousand pictures we’re going through, off the living room floor yet.  We’re still looking at them.  Plus, we’re expecting family to come down any day now and look through them with us.

2.  I haven’t sent out any “Thank you for your sympathy” cards yet, but I’ve got them all ready.  I am usually quite a stickler about thank -you cards, but I just can’t seem to get going on these.  No, online thanks will not do.  People who go out of their way for us, in any aspect of life, deserve something they can hold in their hands, even if they really couldn’t care less.  Why do I do it, then, if it doesn’t matter to them?  I do it because it matters to me.

3.  Whenever my children come down, I like to have a humongous peanut butter Rice Krispie treat awaiting them.  The peanut butter not only makes the treats tastier; it also turns them into breakfast really nutritious snacks.  Today was no exception; the treat was still warm when the kids arrived, and they took the leftovers back with them.  I do not put my peanut butter Rice Krispie treats in a pan, however.  I just spread them out on a big piece of waxed paper.  Why dirty a pan when the kids are just going to dive into that Rice Krispie treat like a couple of starving wild animals?  On a piece of waxed paper, it’s easier to tear off a hunk.  More fun, too.

4.  I haven’t put my midterm grades on Blackboard yet.  When I first tried, I couldn’t get in, and now I’m not motivated.  I’ll do it tomorrow.  I know my students want to know their standing, and I will let them know in the morning, by which I mean, around noon.  I’m on Spring Break now.

5.  I’m coming down with a terrible cold, but I haven’t actually come down with it yet.  I seldom actually come down with anything, but I occasionally try.  I think I’d feel better if I actually GOT something, rather than just be GETTING it.

6.  Those of you who have seen my bathroom know how classic and subdued it is.  I brought home some new wall art for it yesterday, but I haven’t put it up yet.  I’m not sure I know how.  Item:  the new wall art does not sing, dance, chirp,  or talk.  In fact, it’s kind of, well, ordinary.  Imagine.

7.  I haven’t stopped missing Michele Agnew yet.

8.  I still haven’t accepted the fact that last year’s BlogHer is over, even while I’m already counting down until this year’s BlogHer!  July isn’t all that far away, you know, and I’m going to be a Mic Jockey this summer!  To say that I absolutely CAN’T WAIT would be an understatement.  I love you, BlogHer!

9.  I haven’t run my sweeper for over a week.  How can I, with all those photographs spread out all over the floor?

10.  I h aven’t made Rice Krispie treats with real Rice Krispies in years.  Today’s batch was made with generic marshmallows and Kroger Crispy Rice, and NOBODY could tell the difference.  Why buy that expensive name brand stuff when the store brand is three dollars cheaper and tastes exactly the same?  (Item:  be persnickety about those store brands.  I’ve tried some that weren’t fit to eat, but most store brands seem to be pretty much exactly the same as the ritzy stuff.)  (Experiment!)

1.  Spring FORWARD; fall BACK.  I’ve changed a few clocks that I look at regularly, but elsewhere in the house?  Not yet.  Also, I’m too lazy I’m too short to reach most of the wall clocks, so they don’t need to be sprung forward at all because they never fell back last autumn.    Except, of course, for the clocks I couldn’t reach LAST year to change, which means those clocks were correct until now, but will be wrong until next “time.”  How many clocks are in this house?  Search me.  Once I have to remove my shoes to count anything, I lose interest, and my kids were involved in so many activities when they were in school, I was genuinely paranoid about the time. My children are grown up now, but the clocks and the obsession about time remain. It might be a lot worse, you know. At least I’m not a drunk or a kleptomaniac; I just HAVE TO KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS, and every wall in my house has learned to cater to that.

2.  Oh Hoss, my dear, darling Hoss.  Gene Maudlin died yesterday, and I haven’t quite really realized it yet.  I never will.  The Blogosphere will never be the same.  You’ll be greatly missed, Hoss.  Your pithy posts and comments made me happy, and your emails always made me feel important, and well, like SOMEBODY.  You were one who made a big, big difference.   Readers, Please go and read my dear friend Vicki’s beautiful tribute to this lovely, lovely man.

3.  I’ve been Freecycling “stuff” like mad, but I’m not finished yet.  I’ve cleaned out three houses after a death now, and I will NOT put my kids through this kind of a mess when I go.  The Christmas “stuff” alone will be excavation enough; the rest of house is going to be EASY!!!!  Well, easiER, anyway.

4.  I haven’t graded a single essay this weekend, and I don’t even care.  Nyahh. I’ll get them done during the students’ midterm exams this week.  I know they’re greatly looking forward to them.  I mean, who wouldn’t be? 

5.  I still have my entire wedding set of dinnerware:  Woolworth’s best!  Not a piece is broken.  I will keep it forever.  However, I also have about eight other complete unbroken sets of dinnerware.  Most of it has to go.  I haven’t figured out which to give away and which to keep yet, though.  It’s all sentimental in some way.  That’s my biggest housekeeping problem; everything reminds me of someone precious.  There’s not a tasteful, Good Housekeeping thing in my entire home, but everything in it is connected to something or someone else.  That’s how I like to live, my dears.  However, one must be a LITTLE bit practical, and almost everything a few things simply must go.   Come on over.  Bring boxes.  I suppose that if we were a notoriously “breaky” family, I wouldn’t still have all this “stuff,” but the fact is, even when the children were small, we were all careful people and seldom broke any dishes.  Ever. 

6.  I haven’t taken the cats to the vet for their spring tonics and flea drops yet.  We’re still paying for my husband’s bypass of last fall, and now we have to somehow pay for a funeral.  Life can really suckerpunch a fella, huh.  Sorry, kitties, tell the fleas to stand by.

7.  Please don’t suggest that we sell all of this “stuff” instead of giving it away.  I know we could, but I also remember how it was to need some of these things and not be able to buy them.  I would much rather see them go to nice people who need them and who will USE them for their families, than to supply some dealer with stuff for a store shelf, so he/she can make a buck.   I’m also seeing some genuine gratitude over it, not that I need to SEE that, but it makes me feel even more sure that I’m doing it right.  I haven’t regretted this yet.

8.  I haven’t made a will yet, or checked on my life insurance lately, but I intend to, and soon.  PLEASE don’t any of you die without life insurance!  

9.  Heavy windstorm warnings.  Severe thunderstorm warnings.  Temperature in the seventies.  Crocuses blooming.  Trees budding.  This time last week, the temp was in the single digits.  Next week: rumors of snow.  Welcome to southern Indiana.  I haven’t put away the heavy coats yet, nor have I gotten out any summer clothing, even though most of the people we saw in town today looked as if they were heading to the beach.  Gun-jumpers, that’s what I say.

10.  I intended to make corn bread to go with the black bean soup tonight, but I forgot.  I’ll have some for tomorrow’s leftovers, though.  Item:  the black bean soup is for my husband; I wouldn’t touch that smelly stuff with a ten-foot-pole.    He, on the other hand, loves it.  Well, he can have it.  All of it!    I’d tell you what it reminds me of, but my mother raised me with better manners than that.  Well, she tried her best, anyhow.