Scheiss Weekly

category archive listing Category Archives: Humor

I Am Forever Out Of Season

March 6, 2011 – 11:06 pm

Mamacita says:  We don’t use our front door much unless we have houseguests, and then mainly because we don’t want anybody to risk tripping over something as they follow the tiny path of nonclutter through the garage to the outer door that we mostly use when entering and exiting the house. No, we don’t really [...]

By Jane Goodwin | Also posted in Christmas, holidays, Indiana, Jane Goodwin, JaneG, Mamacita, Mamacita Jane, Mamacita Says, MamacitaG, Not the imitation Mamacita, Oh No She Dinnit, Scheiss Weekly, The real Mamacita | Comments (3)

"I Base Most Of My Fashion Sense on What Doesn’t Itch"

February 27, 2011 – 3:33 pm

Mamacita says:  I’d like to tell you that my fashion sense has improved since I wrote this post so long ago, but even though I’ve awoken somewhat to what people are wearing these days, I’m still a flat-out C minus in fashion awareness. Fair warning: I have no sense of taste when it comes to [...]

By Jane Goodwin | Also posted in Body image, etiquette, fools, It's Outrageous!, Jane Goodwin, JaneG, Mamacita, Mamacita Jane, Mamacita Says, MamacitaG, memories, My son, nostalgia, Not the imitation Mamacita, Oh No She Dinnit, opinions, Political Correctness, Scheiss Weekly, The real Mamacita, Things Nice People Already Know, Uncategorized | Comments (1)

Yes, I Fear I’ve Definitely Said Too Much

February 26, 2011 – 1:08 am

Mamacita says:  Several years ago, we cleaned out the garage because it was so full of  “stuff,” we couldn’t even park a car in there. For a while, all was well. When the weather got cold, I parked the car in the garage and never had to scrape the windshield; it was great. We lived [...]

By Jane Goodwin | Also posted in Family, Jane Goodwin, JaneG, Mamacita, Mamacita Jane, Mamacita Says, MamacitaG, My son, Not the imitation Mamacita, Oh No She Dinnit, parenting, Scheiss Weekly, The real Mamacita | Comments (5)

Center of the Universe, You Say? I Think Not.

February 24, 2011 – 9:48 pm

Mamacita says:  All my life I have loathed the expression, “Act your age.” Even as a child I wondered how a person could ‘act’ an age; the best I could ever do was to ‘be’ an age. “Act” always connoted phoniness to me. I totally agree with the little girl in this joke. How can [...]

By Jane Goodwin | Also posted in children, Education, etiquette, Family, fools, grief, Indiana, It's Outrageous!, Jane Goodwin, JaneG, Lessons learned, love, Mamacita, Mamacita Jane, Mamacita Says, MamacitaG, memories, nostalgia, Not the imitation Mamacita, Oh No She Dinnit, parenting, Political Correctness, Scheiss Weekly, teenagers, The real Mamacita, Things Nice People Already Know | Comments (1)

Elevator Etiquette 101

February 18, 2011 – 1:55 am

Mamacita says:  These are, of course, Things Nice People Already Know. Basic Elevator Etiquette for Dummies: 1. Push the appropriate button. If the button is already glowing, do not push it. If you repeatedly push an already-glowing button, everybody will know what you are. 2. Stand back. LEAVE ROOM FOR PEOPLE TO EMERGE FROM THE [...]

By Jane Goodwin | Also posted in Contests, Education, etiquette, fools, Indiana, Jane Goodwin, JaneG, Mamacita, Mamacita Jane, Mamacita Says, Not the imitation Mamacita, Oh No She Dinnit, Political Correctness, Scheiss Weekly, Social media, Things Nice People Already Know | Comments (3)

Things I Still Haven’t Done Yet

February 11, 2011 – 10:02 pm

Mamacita says: what’s the hurry, anyway? 1.  I have never used an ATM machine.  I have a feeling it would be the beginning of a bad personal habit. 2.  I still have never watched a single Survivor-type show.  Still not interested. 3.  Ditto for Oprah, and even less interested. 4.  The Christmas wreath is probably [...]

By Jane Goodwin | Also posted in children, Christmas, Education, etiquette, Family, fools, Friendship, Harry Potter, Jane Goodwin, JaneG, Literature, Mamacita, Mamacita Jane, Mamacita Says, MamacitaG, memories, Movies, Not the imitation Mamacita, Oh No She Dinnit, Political Correctness, Scheiss Weekly, schools, teachers, teenagers, The real Mamacita, Things I Haven't Done Yet, Things Nice People Already Know, Traditions | Comments (5)

Omens, Witch-burning, and Fools

January 12, 2011 – 2:59 am

Mamacita says:  Second day of class, and we’re buried alive in snow, so much so that even the college canceled classes. I don’t believe in omens, but I can’t help thinking, “omen.” I did what I usually do on a snow day:  I slept.  That is because I am an exciting, energetic bundle of cool, [...]

By Jane Goodwin | Also posted in Education, English, fools, grammar, Jane Goodwin, JaneG, Linguistics, Literature, love, Mamacita, Mamacita Jane, Mamacita Says, MamacitaG, Night owl, Not the imitation Mamacita, Oh No She Dinnit, Political Correctness, Scheiss Weekly, schools, teachers, teenagers, The real Mamacita, writing | Comments (1)

Did you learn anything interesting today?

January 3, 2011 – 12:05 am

Mamacita says: This is five years old, but it’s still a good random sample of my day.  Remember, helping students make connections is my “thing,” but it helps when they have something to connect things to.  Sometimes I think a good combination of personalities can find connections among/between almost anything.  This is wonderful, by the [...]

By Jane Goodwin | Also posted in Books, Education, English, grammar, Jane Goodwin, JaneG, Literature, love, Mamacita, Mamacita Jane, Mamacita Says, MamacitaG, memories, Not the imitation Mamacita, Oh No She Dinnit, Scheiss Weekly, teachers, teenagers, The real Mamacita, Uncategorized | Comments (2)

The Twelve Rules of Christmas

December 24, 2010 – 8:21 pm

Mamacita says: There are, of course Twelve Actual Rules of Christmas, according to the law, and in case you don’t know what they are and have intentions of storming the school or business that’s maliciously ignoring your rights as a Christian/Jew/Catholic/Protestant/Wiccan/Pagan/Atheist/Order of Elfland/Kisser of Mother Earth’s Backside, etc, perhaps y’all should take a glance at [...]

By Jane Goodwin | Also posted in Baking, children, Christmas, Family, Friendship, holidays, Jane Goodwin, JaneG, love, Mamacita, Mamacita Jane, Mamacita Says, MamacitaG, memories, Movies, nostalgia, religion, Scheiss Weekly, The Things We Do For Love, Traditions | Comments (2)

You must learn, young Padawan, but finals are now officially over

December 21, 2010 – 12:05 am

Fair warning:  there is “language” ahead. . . . Mamacita says: I gave finals to five classes last week. Most of my students last semester were awesome; I adore them. I already miss them.  They rocked.  All semester, they worked hard, had wonderful discussions, participated, helped each other, LISTENED, made suggestions. . . . the [...]

By Jane Goodwin | Also posted in Education, fools, JaneG, Lessons learned, Mamacita, Mamacita Jane, Mamacita Says, MamacitaG, Political Correctness, Porn, Scheiss Weekly, schools, teachers, teenagers, The real Mamacita, Things Nice People Already Know, Uncategorized, work ethic | Comments (3)