Which Is Cheaper: Beer Nuts or Deer Nuts?*

Mamacita says:  Many years ago, I was teaching Public Speaking in a small farmland high school in southern Indiana. My students’ assignment was to give an informal “how-to” presentation, a demonstration of something they personally knew how to do.

That week, we all learned how to crochet a chain stitch, how to do macrame, how to carve a simple wooden toy, how to change a tire, how to juggle, how to put a belt on a broken vacuum cleaner, how to put a zipper in a skirt, how to make various color combinations of Easter egg dyes with food coloring and vinegar, and how to make homemade ice cream.

We also learned how to put a suppository up a cow’s butt, how to take a horse’s temperature with a rectal thermometer, and how to neuter a bull calf.

It was a really interesting week. I’ve never been able to look at a rubber band or a razor blade the same way since.

*Deer nuts are cheaper; they’re always under a buck.beer nuts
** You didn’t hear it from me.
*** I’m a lady.
**** I never buy deer nuts. I do, however, sample them if they’re offered.
***** Shut up.


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