1. It didn’t rain today, and all the plants, animals, and people are in shock. I mean to say, we don’t know what to do with ourselves. We’re peeking out of the ark and seeing sunlight. I guess one of us should send a dove out to scope for land.
2. All the plants in the WalMart nursery are marked down to quarters and fitty-cent pieces, so I bought a few Gerbera daisies, black-eyed Susans, and coleus to fill in the dead spots where what I planted before was washed away or dissolved like the Wicked Witch of the West.
3. 4-gig flash drives are on sale at Big Lots for ten bucks. I thought that was a pretty good deal. I’m a sucker for a good electronics bargain.
4. I wish I could get my hair cut before BlogHer. I also wish I could lose a hundred pounds before BlogHer, but neither one is going to happen. Not unless I figure out how to win the lottery and conquer the space/time continuum in the next few days. Don’t hold your breath.
5. I have a doctor’s appointment tomorrow at 2:30, and I have a creepy feeling that he’s going to take one look at my bloodwork and say the words “daily injection,” whereupon I will not freak out, exactly, but I might have to go to the gym and run on the treadmill until it makes like a cartoon treadmill and falls apart, revealing all kinds of gears and sproingy springs and whirly things underneath, all run by a frantically sprinting hamster in one of those little Ferris wheel-like cage-wheels. I guess some might call that freaking out, but I don’t. When I freak out, you’ll know it.
6. I’m sure I don’t know why I haven’t lost any more weight lately. My recent late-night ham sandwich swimming in Miracle Whip obsession can’t have anything to do with it.
7. I have a lovely stone planter full of blooming rosebushes, but nobody can see it because while I mowed around it just the other day, nobody here has trimmed around it yet this summer and the grass is over two feet tall, totally obliterating both the roses and anybody’s chance of seeing them until something is done. Again, don’t hold your breath. It’s a kind of test I’m giving.
8. We had Grecco’s pizza for supper. It had been a while, and it was really good. Porking down in the restaurant did not, however, prevent me from my current ham sandwich swimming in Miracle Whip fetish a few minutes ago.
9. Just can’t seem to lose any more weight. It’s a mystery. I must have hit a plateau; I’ve read about them and my situation matches.
10. Fat chicks are really, really good at rationalizing their own stupid behaviors.